Freedom is the ultimate privilege

Something happened the past few weeks. For the first time since the start of the year did I have the most restful nights.

I didn’t have overflowing to dos. Work is suddenly manageable, I’ve checked out most of my personal finance goals for the year despite hastily in 3Q, and there are things I am okay to hold off. I spend about the same time with Cat but could give him my undivided attention. He’s fine with me burying my face into his belly but will get annoyed with the constant brushing.

I’m waking up on my own accord and feel I have enough sleep. Oh the simplest but bestest privilege!

Got-to-be-productive culture & burnout

While I find it hard to admit it, I think I went through burnout and was still reeling from post-burnout recovery the last 2 months. I spent a lot of time on bed, doom-scrolling and not having any to do lists (so unlike me!). 

When I started getting back on my to do lists, I procrastinated and tasks took longer than necessary to complete. I'm proud to say that as of today I'm almost done with them yipeee!

What started was a job change in 2023 that got me over 20% increment and not long later, pro-rated annual increment again. I didn't mention it on my IG because I wanted to keep it for a few months into the job but due to me growing tired of work, I didn't bother bringing this up.

Initially, I was happy because I finally gotten a role I wanted since before the pandemic and it was fun until the workload got unbearable. I could go at lengths to tell you about it but to put it oh so very simply, it was demanding in time, effort and brain power. I was working until the wee morning almost every day. This went on for months. 

Every time fam or friends ask what am I doing, it's always work. It was no badge of honor, I was so-o-o sick of me saying that all the time.

The signs of depression

• Didn't have time for pasttimes or even proper sleep
• Dreading work bc it occupies my head 24/7
• Sighing more frequently
• Losing ability to focus and brain no longer braining

I went through a high-functioning depression period. Yeah I just learnt you can be depressed and still perform. However, over time it became more and more obvious I was dragging myself to work. Unimaginably me. 

It made sense though, the 'work battery' is like 'social battery' and it will deplete unless given time to recharge. I was ready to quit even without a backup plan.

If you asked me if I still love the role, I'll still say yes. In fact, if the workload has been way manageable I'd have stayed. There are a few lessons learnt for sure and one of it is not to be utterly loyal especially more in this retrenchment era, corporations do not care. Tho I wouldn't describe myself as "utterly loyal" but definitely  "having dumb level of perseverance and personal ownership" *Roll eyes*

Recovering from a burnout

I think the largest part of it is maintaining good habits and not feeding the victim mentality. Maybe this is a millennial thingy, we're definitely more resilient.

Burnout recovery tips:

• Eat well
• Maintain proper hygiene care
• Rest sufficiently
• Exercise
• Connect with nature
• Connect with people (if you like, I'd rather not)
• Don't feed the narrative or victim mentality
• Having the mindset of wanting to get well

Exercise is something I'd recommend. I used to like those with moves involving throwing punches and kicks. They're great stress reliever. These days I do HIIT and I'm back to weights training. If I do just 30 minutes a few times a week, I don't beat myself for staying in bed for longer hours.

One thing for sure is Cat kept me sane. He demands attention even though for a few minutes, a few times a day. It kept me away from my laptop and moving (we play chase around the house). And yes, there are snuggles and purrs. Though it made me guilty at times when I can't spend with him. 

Many times I tell Cat, I'm glad you're just a cat and not a hooman baby. Yes, to the capitalist and government, women DON'T want to have children when you're keeping us so-o-o very busy at work. On top of the ever increasing cost of living, the long-term degradation of environment for short-term profit making and 1001 white elephants in the room you pretend not to see. 

I kept joking about waiting for alien invasion. Then I had an epiphany: what if the invasion is happening? Instead of aliens going pew pew the whole civilizations like in the movies, all they needed to do is convincing women to not reproduce because economy and men. Mostly men. Baby bust happens, civilization diminished, aliens walks on earth. Easy peasy. 

Also their other invasion plan is the cat distribution system because we need cute distractions but really, they're flerkens.

One of Chatgpt deduction when I was asking why I'm suddenly experiencing hives.

Unsustainable economy model

While my overworking experience was personal and definitely do not apply for all, I do think these days corporation seems to expects excessive level of continuous productivity and they want it at a overhead cost low. Meaning employees are expected to handle workload of multiple headcount. This for the sake of making the corporation appears profitable. Now guess who will get the big bonuses? 

I don't think the world will go round with the top percentile hoarding wealth while 'building' unemployment or lower income group. I think the internet says it better so go read that up. 

Also read up Warren Buffett's pledge while you're on the subject.

More than 99% of my wealth will go to philanthropy during my lifetime or at death. 

Warren Buffett, The Giving Pledge

Generally, I think the current economy model isn't sustainable. With the change of demographic size in the future and an economy model that relies on population growth, even someone with limited knowledge of economics can see that this is a concerning situation. 

If implementing changes takes time, it’s best to start as soon as possible.

In a hindsight...

freedom is the ultimate privilege. The freedom to choose a job you enjoy. The freedom of time to pursue past times or even to have a break. 

After all that happened, I am definitely more motivated in my pursue for financial freedom and ultimately, abundance.

8 Level of FIRE from moneyandcake.com

On a final note, I know it's the last day of 2024 but I am still on the drawing board with my 2025 goals. Many remain unchanged but I felt like I needed to be more diligent with tracking. 

I usually practice Keep it Simple & Stupid aka K.I.S.S. meaning I don't track my finances down to the cents. If I save X amount or don't overspend for the month, I tell myself I'm good. But many times I wonder if I'm too lenient with expenses. That's one privilege I'm grateful for! But again, I want to be able to enjoy this privileges on a long run.

So, anyone else eating 12 grapes tonight? Just asking...